2009 – Page 4 – sportreview.net.nz

Roman Abramovich checks in

Didier Drogba: Yeaaaaaaaaaaah!

Roman: Greetings. We have not spoken for some time, but I have not been idle. No, I work hard to realise my vision of a world where my enemies pray for the swift, merciful death a chainsaw brings.

Didier Drogba: Number ONE baby, yeah!

Roman: This man Scolari disappointed me deeply. I saw him as my dark prince, sitting beside my throne, amusing me whenever I poked him with a sharp stick. But when I took him in to my Sloane Square rook, and he recoiled at my taxidermy Chelsea fans, I knew I must let him go.

Didier Drogba: Look at this big shiny trophy – IN YOUR FACE!

Roman: And so I walk alone once again. My only amusement is punching dogs in the face. This ‘Football’ is for the weak and fat, but remains the perfect cover for my operations.

Didier Drogba: Paaaaaaaarty!

Roman: Sleep well, my friends. Soon, you will know the triumph of riding trained bears through London streets awash with blood. Await my signal.

Links on Friday: Father Ted

“This is one of those times that I’m absolutely, one million percent sure that you’d be doing the right thing!”

“Fupp off, we come here every fupping Sunday!”

“He’s circling the airport.”

“Ride me sideways is another one!”

Friday bike pron

Seriously, this is just showing off.

Keep your eye on the tweets

Stand in skipper Brendon McCullum tweets us through that dropped chance.

Friday bike pron

Here’s @bradwiggins on his awesome Great Britain Felt TT ride, complete with Union Jack wheel.

A broken chain meant Wiggo only finished 21st at the World Champs – still, he doesn’t appear to be feeling much pain now.

And here’s a Japanese track bike and an Adidas trainer mating, just in case there’s any hipsters reading.

Link on Friday – Jules Winnfield: Youth Hockey Coach

No proper links this Friday, team, but this should keep you going.

Plumbing the depths

The Howlett tweets

I’m still not 100% that @doughowlett is the real deal, but his Twitter stream has an undeniable rambling charm. Social Media strategy? Bah!

Rapha 10×10 challenge

Col de Espresso Challenge from RAPHA on Vimeo.

London’s Rapha, purveyors of lustful, pricey Cycling kit have been running a 10×10 challenge on their blog, including ten steep climbs and riding ten bikes in ten minutes. Best so far, though is the ten expressos in ten minutes, while sportreview usually starts a ride with ONE shot, drinking ten would risk unacceptable levels of lycra clenching on ride.

Links on Friday – Sporting TV endorsements

Tiger Woods, World’s Best Golfer™ never shies away from earning shitloads of cash flogging Rolexes, Private Jets or have you – at least he *can* do it with some style if he wants to.

No shit guy Lance Armstrong, too, is big on endorsements. Yes, he’s an incredible rider, but bringing dead Elephants back to life is a bridge too far, surely.

Shane Warne has joined the Cricket greats in endorsing hair growth snake oil, and has worked in an office, but just look what the mother of his children has been reduced to.

And of course, the South Africans do TV spots as boringly efficiently as they beat All Black sides. Hilarious.