Links on Friday

If you’re a 38 year old unfit would-be footballer, and you ever get a chance to take a penalty at indoor or seven-a-side football, you are duty bound to perform a Panenka. Here are ten of the best, number one is my favorite

Turns our Floyd Landis of the Floyd Fairness Fund has not only turned into the Bear Queen Of The Forest (see image in the story) but is trolling Lance Armstrong on Twitter. The rotter

The seven annoying friends you meet at pub quizzes. I am none of these. I am basically the perfect person to have in a pub quiz team

Hot New Video Game Consists Solely Of Shooting People Point-Blank In The Face

Why is U2 so popular?

Links on Friday

Totally wasted guy walks home. As awesome as it sounds.

If I was a suave Inter Milan supporting golfer, I’d totally wear these Nike Inter Milan Lunar Control Golf Shoes. I mean – LUNAR CONTROL? Who could resist?

Check this out for a sweet dismount – get in the hole!

ESPN sportsguy Bill Simmons has launched Grantland, his new sports writing site, featuring usual suspect Chuck Klosterman, among others. Would be handier with an RSS feed though.

Links on Friday – Jimmy Cowan

If you haven’t been to youtube and typed ‘Jimmy Cowan’ into the search box, you’re missing out on more comedy and violence than a Die Hard quadruple feature. The seemingly surly Southland scamp, when he’s not dishing it out like on this sneaky late hit on Jimmy Gopperth or smacking his own captain on the head, is getting it dished up to him by Bakkes fucking Botha in an alarming fashion.

Still, that doesn’t mean he’s not up for some fun, like kicking Dan Carter’s arse in a trick kicks competitiongetting Ma’a Nonu sent off for the laugh and having some harmless japes with the officials. Mind you, this is probably the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. Cheer up, Jimmy!

Links on Friday

If you’re a chippy little Aussie bleeder, mouthing off a bunch of eight foot West Indians wouldn’t be my first move. But. Check out the big balls on Steve Waugh. Seriously.

The Crack Fox is possibly my second favourite fox. After Basil Brush.

News guy forgets he’s on the telly, tells weather guy to keep fucking that chicken. That’s great news guy-ing. He had to say sorry.

This film The Beaver is pretty much what I imagine happens to Graeme Smith between world cups.

Links on Friday

There’s something deeply, deeply compelling about seeing Tottenham’s winning goal at Milan complete with a GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAL! complete with a commentator sounding as excited as if someone released a load of mousetraps into the commentary booth

Virals are hard. Exhibit A: The Warratah’s clever, real and most importantly, FUNNY summer skills video takes our pointless effort and runs to the tryline like it’s a World Cup semi. Ahem

If NFL teams wore football jerseys

If FUCKYEAHALEXFERGUSONGETTINGNARKYWITHTVINTERVIEWERS.tumblr.com existed, I’d probably end up watching it all day

Dadrock holiday

sportreview is going on holiday for a few days, to that country to the west. Posts will be even more sporadic than usual until we get back – I’ll update the twitter if anything of interest happens, but I’m more interested in that parked on arse / reading / drinking beer love triangle, to be fair.

Anyway. Here’s a few links to keep you going:

Rob Smyth on the Pakistan spot gambling scandal

– Making football legends at the Ajax academy

– The Guardian’s joy of six page on penalties and one-twos

Puny writer type takes on proper tennis player in a mission to win one point

Is test cricket on the ropes?

LA Dodgers Star Wars night

Links on Friday

This rally driver was doing great until he drives past some guy unable to keep his arse in his jeans. Features NSFW language in a badass Kiwi accent.

Footballers, learn from the great Totti – if you’re bothering to shave, get dressed and drive the Lambo to the ground, and if you want to foul someone, REALLY foul them. Don’t muck around.

The affectionate nickname for Marmite at the sportreview castle is ‘black death’. It’s horrible, team.

Are you a horse? It’s very motivating.

Links on Friday

These sin-binned-hockey-player-taunting green men made me laugh a lot, especially when one pretends to cry (via @cam_mcmillan)

Poor Wayne Rooney, can’t even have a pint in peace

In alternate reality comes to life news, Maradonna tuns out for Tottenham. He’s no Steffan Freund.

Casual! Casual! Casual! He’ll regret that quite spectacular own goal, and that haircut

Links on Friday

Formula One is very, very boring indeed – the only way to make it exciting is by ‘bad-ass’ ‘shredding’ on an ‘axe’

Be like Tiger without all that messy indiscriminate sleeping around and media attention with the Tiger Woods soundboard

This guy takes the ‘goal-keepers are crazy’ saying and upgrades to insane

NZers, you can see Paris-Roubaix, the hell of the north, on Sky Sport 3 on Monday at 9am. Take the day off work, tell your boss some guy on the internet said it was OK