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Things David Warner should have been fined for

Everyone’s favourite angry gnome is sick of just playing cricket and that, and is once more focused on verbals and being held back from fights he’d definitely win.

His encounter with de Kock has had more close examination of camera angles than the JFK assassination, with none of them showing much that you’d write home about. Any more discipline demerit points for Warner in the next couple of years will draw a suspension, and free him up to spend more time with his family he’s gotten so angry defending.

In fairness, his coach and CEO seem pretty relaxed about losing their world class opening bat for brain-explosion reasons. Maybe the board should have a view.

Anyway, can exclusively reveal the first Test sideshow is just the tip of the iceberg for fine-worthy infringements. Behold:


You can click it to make it bigger.

Bay City Ovalers

BLACKCAPS v England, Bay Oval, Mount Maunganui 28 February 2018

‘It’s great these lights are *finally* up,’ said Neil Craig, NZC board member and a driving force behind developing Bay Oval, while being interviewed on the big screen mid way through England’s innings.

The ‘finally’ indicates the ambition for this ground. Competition is getting fierce among the new breed of boutique grounds that includes University Oval, Hagley Park and  Saxton Oval (not to mention Queenstown, Whangarei, New Plymouth and arguably the Basin, now it’s been opened up to white ball cricket). But the Bay’s oval has moved fastest to get those all-important lights, and was rewarded with the popular holiday period T20s, along with Napier’s only scheduled international game thrown in.

It’s not hard to see more ODIs against the big guns coming here after 8000 or so punters packed in on a Wednesday night, and day / night Tests were mentioned more than once in conversations on the grass banks. It’s an easy ground for punters to get around and find a spot that suits on the banks, and the food on offer is top class, including Tag Burger. The Mount looks bloody fantastic on SKY’s  drone shots too.

I’m certain the building won’t stop there either, this ground has built up a serious head of steam. A new stand next?

As for the cricket, it was pretty enjoyable. For England. They fielded like the Kray Twins chasing down a debt, and their batsmen did to us what Ross Taylor and Tom Latham did to them in Hamilton, finding gaps and play it risk-free. It was classy stuff, and this series looks like a tough  assignment for both teams, and an intriguing one for the fans.

Not even Pakistan hipster cable knit could save us #cricket

A post shared by Richard Irvine (@richirvine) on




Links on Friday

Mesmerising Russian Ice Hockey player Nikita Kucherov gets right inside this goalie’s head and makes himself at home with a fumble-shot, faking to lose the puck but actually sending it smugly goalward. He’s done it before, to the same poor keeper.


Long read: a profile of ex-Philidelphia 76ers’ General Manager Sam Hinkie, the Stanford geek who took Moneyball to the extreme by selling his all team’s decent players, with the aim of finishing last and rebuilding from scratch with high draft picks. The fans were split into ‘WTF is going on’ and ‘Trust the process’ camps, and Hinkie, who was fond of appalling corporate-speak like ‘you don’t get to the moon by climbing a tree’, was out after three years. In a shocking plot twist, the team is actually coming right, lead by Joel Embiid, who nicknamed himself ‘The Process’. Read more. And even more.

Nike’s London campaign video is genius:

This (presumably Canadian) God is coming to save the world.

Links on Friday

The beautiful game used to bring out the best in designers, keen to push the boundaries on the biggest stage of all. These Days, football shirts are basically designed to look good with a pair of jeans – The Art of the Football Shirt is a hipper-than-thou exhibition of when shirts were less marketing-department-orientated – some great photos here.

If you missed Carlton Cole’s epic Twitter thread on West Ham United’s ‘banter era’, it’s time well spent and basically War and Peace written by Del Boy Trotter.

Skater Christian Flores tries to land a laser flip down a triple set of stairs. For two years. Surprisingly affecting stuff!

Radio New Zealand’s Eyewitness show looks at the 1992 bomb blast outside the NZ Men’s Cricket Team’s hotel – it packs a lot into 13 minutes and confirms fall out from this incident is still ongoing in 2017.

Being there – Māori All Blacks v Lions, Rotorua stadium

This is an intriguing point of the tour – the Lions sent to a tough venue to  play a tough team a week out from the first Test. Which will be tough. You get the idea.

The misty, niggly rain that turned up a few hours from kick off, which had the Lions’ big pack licking their lips like they were being offered vinegar on their fish and chips and hurt the Māori ABs’ backline chances for razzle or dazzle.

Frankly, the home team were flat when the occasion called for a bit more. The bright spots of a stirring haka and home town hero Liam Messam’s try came early but there was little else to cheer about, despite some big hits going in late.

The Lions had all the control and their big strong runners and big long kickers won the territory battle comfortably.  Their first job is making sure they’re tough to beat and it’ll be the same next week. Can’t wait.

Off-field it was fantastic grass roots stuff, Rotorua’s big banks were often more entertaining than the game, with several punters forced to regret their choice of non-grip footwear. I bet we had more fun than all those Lions fans in the end-on segregated seating.

Links on Friday

Mascots are generally soul-less husks, but the New York Mets’ Mr Met brings a raw honesty to his work. He’s been fired, of course.

I’d just bought a flat but the moving-in day was the Tuesday of the first Ashes Test at Edgbaston. I get picked on Sunday. I’m speaking to the chairman of selectors and I say, ‘That’s great, but I’ve kind of bought a flat and I need to move in on Tuesday, do you mind if I turn up on the Wednesday?’ I’d made up my mind that I was going to do everything on my own terms. He was probably thinking, ‘Who’s this guy?’

Long, raw and fascinating interview with Mark Butcher on his bizzaro life as an international cricketer. The ‘few beers in a pub garden’ interviewing style here really works.

SIGNAL from Revel Co. on Vimeo.

Nothing worse than social media criticism – but consider England, responsible for cricket’s existence, being mocked by the game’s governing body with a GIF featuring  a reality TV (presumably) unknown. Cheap effort for clicks from a digital team who’re otherwise kicking arse at making footage and exclusives available online fast.

Warriors release limited edition ‘Fan Fire’ jersery

NEWSDESK: In an effort to reconnect with frustrated supporters, the NZ Warriors team have reached out to jersey-burning fans with a limited edition Fan Fire jersey.

“The Warriors Faithful Sent Us A Clear Message On Social Media,” said Warriors marketing exec Des Frazzler. “They Want The Boys To Show Some Fire.”

The eighteenth jersey to be released in coach Stephen Kearny’s first season comes in red and blue flame editions and will be available at Waikato Stadium this Friday night for $190 for adults and $185 for kids.

When asked if the Fan Flame jerseys are flammable, Frazzler confirmed “They’ll burn all right. They’ll burn.”