Don’t read this blog!

Despite looking like he wants to sweep your chimney, Iain O’Brien is an international cricketer. Not only that, but he’s blogging all about it. JRod (twice), Paul Holden and Mike (and Ben) on Cricket have all pointed to this bit of cricketing literary genius. He’s simply writing honestly about what it’s like to play international Cricket. And he writes well.

This is brilliant, and should have happened years ago. Imagine if, say, Richard Hadlee had blogged the Brisbane test:

Woke up. Gave the mo a good trim. Did those Aussie bastards all day. Can’t believe Vaughan fucking Brown got that wicket. I should have dropped it. Entered stats into the book back at the hotel to relax. Slept for seven hours and forty five minutes. Disconcerting dream about Karen.

Iain, if you’re reading, wanna swap links?

Day one of the Australia v New Zealand test series

Well that went alright.

It’s only day one, but we mean business. Southee will sleep tonight untroubled by Ricky Ponting nightmares. Nightmares of Brett Lee formation dancing through a Bollywood number, but not Ricky. Brilliantly, Jesse Ryder has the Jerry Coney-like knack of picking up wickets, and seems to find it all a bit of a laugh, too. Having the Aussies in the field for two hundred odd is more that we could have hoped for, well done to Dan and his bowlers

There’s a loooong way to go in this game and series, but the chaps will take great heart from this, 10 wickets in hand makes a huge psychological difference. The three bloggers below, all vastly wiser than me on matters cricket, pick our opening partnerships as vital to our success. I’d like to see How and Redmond still there after an hour. At lunch, even. We need to take our time and make sure we get a first innings lead, especially if the pitch still has life. We saw how Australia responded to pressure in India, so let’s keep it up.

Proper cricket bloggers preview the series / summer:
CWB on how we can win (Aussies’ batting effort was as effective as JRod’s Mo, really)

Ben on reasonable achievements

Hamish McDouall with his predictions for the summer

I’ve also found cricinfo’s WAP site, perfect for keeping up if you’re dragged into a meeting:

Rules for watching the Grand Slam at my place

– You get here by 5.45am. You’re not here by 5.45am, it’s the car radio.

– Come alone. You bring the wife? You’re going home. Kids? You’re going home. That Welsh guy from your work? Home. Clear? Good.

– Bring beer.  Yeah it’s Sunday morning, but this is Rugby. We drink. There’ll be no ‘make one can last the whole game and pour most of it in the sink like the World Cup’, either. It’s three cans per half minimum, and I’m going to be watching you like a fucking hawk.

– You stay quiet while I’m arguing with the commentators unless you’re saying “yeah, Greg’, ‘that’s right, Greg’, ‘good point well made, Greg’, or ‘you should be the commentator, Greg’. I’ll be ringing Deaker after, too, don’t you worry.

– Seeing as you’re around here watching my Sky, I’m going to need $25. That’s half my month’s subscription. Not fair? An 18 month ban from the Rugby club for shit that was never proved’s not fair, either. Just cos a joker’s got spray can on him for a bit of DIY on Sunday doesn’t mean he’s sprayed ‘We Are All Qeers’ on Eastern’s coach. Does it? Didn’t think so.

– Choose one from ‘cell phone off’ or ‘painful kick in the nuts’.

– If the All Blacks win, we’re on the piss for the day, mate. You gotta celebrate. DIY, Kid’s day, blah blah blah, what are ya? We’re going to the RSA. You’re driving.

– If the All Blacks lose you need pack your shit and be out in 60 seconds, starting from final whistle. If I’ve got a whole day of staring angrily at the lawn mower ahead, I want an early start.

Links on Friday

As soon as sportreview jr is old enough, he’ll be doing this kind of thing. But more likely this.

Jimmy Conners is a legend.

Baseball is generally boring. However, I DO like the idea of people throwing peanuts at you.

Badly Injured Man Not Done Partying Yet – “I tried to tell him sprains don’t heal themselves, but he kept calling me a pussy and telling me to chug.” Ah, this takes me back.