- Diving is a blight on football – as always, when you need some simple, violence-based common sense, Mr. T comes to the rescue
- Wow – Argentinian Lionel Messi scores for Barcelona. Handily for The New Maradonna they’ve put his goal next to another famous Argentinian’s finest hour – uncanny
- Runout of the day – AB de Villiars with a runout David Blaine would be proud of (‘cos rarely for him, it wouldn’t be utter shit)
- Rio Ferdinand is a twat – reason # 378
- Rich guy wins yacht race – har
- Ever wondered what happened to Adam out of Adam and Joe? – now you know
